Have you ever noticed that the way you care for the people in your life starts to feel different in midlife?

You still love your family and friends deeply, but perhaps you're less willing or able to keep doing some of the things you've always done for them.

In Episode 37 of Mind Your Being, Cass explores the idea of caring capacity – a concept discussed by relationship counsellor Margie Mitchell (Episode 34) – and asks whether we have to keep caring for others in exactly the same ways we always have.

Cass reflects on the often invisible labour that can come with caring: planning, organising, remembering, anticipating and doing. She shares her own experience of deciding that, now her children are adults, she doesn't need to be responsible for cooking dinner every single night.

She also shares a conversation with a friend who has recently turned 80, whose reflections on a lifetime of caring for others, independence and enjoying her own time made Cass think about how deeply ideas about being ”selfish” can stay with us.

This isn't an episode about caring less. It's about recognising that our energy and capacity are finite, and perhaps becoming more conscious about where we choose to spend them.

What if caring doesn't always have to look like doing?

And what if changing the way we care doesn't mean we care any less?

A warm, honest and conversational reflection on midlife, caring capacity, invisible labour, mental load, motherhood, adult children, guilt, changing priorities and giving ourselves permission to question the way we've always done things. 

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Thanks so much for listening,

Cass x

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