I went into my first therapeutic psilocybin journey prepared to face some sh*t.

I expected old wounds, defense mechanisms, maybe even a few hours of confronting the parts of myself I hadn't been able to access through years of therapy and healing work.

Instead…I got the cosmos.

In this episode, Bre and I unpack the entire experience, from why I chose a facilitated mushroom journey and how I prepared, to what happened during those five hours and the surprisingly physical recovery afterward.

We talk about what it felt like to experience myself as both incredibly small and part of something infinitely bigger, why asking for another damn blanket became a lesson in receiving what I need, and the mantra that followed me through the experience:

Not my shit to carry.

Perhaps the biggest realization came afterward: I went into the journey believing there were still parts of myself I couldn't access because my defenses were too strong. What I found instead was evidence of just how much Internal Safety I've already built and the capacity to feel difficult things, stay with myself through them, and trust that they will move through.

This isn't an episode about mushrooms being the answer. It's an honest conversation about one very personal experience with psilocybin, healing, self-trust, compassion, surrender, boundaries, and what can happen when we feel safe enough to loosen our grip on control.