This episode contains discussions of mental health challenges, which may be distressing for some listeners. Please take care while listening, and reach out to a mental health professional if you need support.

This episode is a little different to what we usually do – but it started with a single quote that we couldn’t stop talking about. 

In an interview, White Lotus actress Meghan Fahy said her psychologist once asked her: “Are you a people pleaser… or are you just anxious about controlling how people perceive you?” And honestly, that question cracked something for us and sparked a big  conversation in our office.

It made us think about how often we conflate being nice with likeable and safe. How hard it can be, especially as women, and as founders, to advocate for ourselves without feeling like we’re letting someone down. And what happens when we start shifting those patterns – and how being firm can result in shifts in relationships.

So for this episode, Alicia and Phoebe sat down with everyone's favourite psychologist and founder of Flow State Space, Rashida Dungarwalla, to unpack all of it.

Rashida has worked across the world – bringing a deeply thoughtful, holistic, and no-BS approach to mental health. She’s trained in everything from psychodynamic therapy to somatic strategies, and she brings a huge amount of empathy, clarity, and humour to the way she works.

In this conversation, we talk about people pleasing, the weaponisation of so-called 'therapy-speak', how boundaries can shift our personal and professional relationships, founder mental health, and what it looks like to really advocate for yourself.