On We Made This Political, hosts Lura Forcum and Lauren Hall talk with writer Ben Appel about his memoir Cis White Gay: The Making of a Gender Heretic and how identity, group loyalty, and the need for belonging shape belief and punish dissent. Appel describes returning to school at Columbia at 33 after a career in hairdressing and personal struggles, and how campus culture, critical theory, and political sloganeering pushed him to question reductive binaries, self-censorship, and seeing government as good only when it serves “my side.” The conversation covers polarization, the lack of ideological viewpoint diversity in education, pressures to conform, debates within gay communities such as marriage equality, and concerns about medicalizing gender-nonconforming youth and the difficulties faced by detransitioners. Appel finds hope in stepping back from social media, connecting with people, and focusing on everyday respect and curiosity, including talking to Trump voters as fellow human beings.

00:00 Talk to Trump Voters

00:19 Meet Ben Appel

01:53 Why Write Cis White Gay

06:57 Parroting Politics

13:14 Life Experience at Columbia

19:23 Starved for Viewpoints

23:23 Critical Theory as Dogma

25:40 Binary Thinking and Trump

31:54 Language Policing in Academia

36:09 Identity Buckets Debate

37:40 Growing Up Effeminate

40:42 From Inclusion to Medicalization

44:15 Critical Theory Distraction

50:22 Performing Identity Wrong

52:40 Gay Marriage Clash

01:03:18 Detransitioners Aftercare Gap

01:07:09 Finding Hope Offline

01:15:05 Wrap Up and Credits

Resources

Ben’s Substack Ben Appel’s Newsletter

Ben’s book, Cis White Gay

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