The 20-year fog

Karl grew up in apartheid South Africa in a wealthy but emotionally distant Austrian-South African family, experiencing what he now understands as complex trauma rooted in his mother’s narcissism and his father’s clinical detachment. For decades he dissociated, unaware he was queer until his late twenties when he met a partner and came out to indifference from his family. He moved to London at 27, then Australia, but remained numb and disconnected from himself until the last two years. Only recently, after leaving corporate work and experiencing a workplace sexual harassment case, has he begun to reclaim his creativity, healing practice, and authentic self. He now writes, mentors others in isolation, and teaches people that the answers we seek live in the quiet spaces we’re taught to fear.

Karl Germann is a queer South African-born Australian now based in Port Macquarie. He spent two decades navigating dissociation and emotional distance from a privileged but cold family before recognizing his lived experience as trauma. He has since become a Reiki practitioner, author of the children’s book The Land Where Unicorns Are Made, and community support worker dedicated to healing and connection.

In this Kintsugi Heroes conversation with John Dwyer, Karl shares the story behind the moments below.

🎙️ IN THIS CONVERSATION:

• Dissociation and small-t trauma can persist silently for decades without dramatic incidents, rooted in emotional distance and hypervigilance from childhood.

• Coming out as queer or reaching any milestone does not instantly resolve the foundational trauma that shaped you.

• Authenticity attracts more meaningful connection and professional success than conformity or self-censorship ever will.

🕒 CHAPTERS:

00:00 Welcome and introduction

01:27 Growing up in apartheid South Africa

08:00 Dissociation, trauma, and the Austrian father

14:30 A narcissistic mother and emotional distance

19:22 Coming out as queer at 27

27:50 Leaving South Africa for London and Australia

35:00 Corporate work, authenticity, and walking away

41:00 Climbing Kilimanjaro and metaphors for life

46:35 Writing, creativity, and The Land Where Unicorns Are Made

50:14 Reiki practice and community connection through Ankali

54:20 Building community, smiling, and winning people over

57:51 Advice for younger selves and closing reflections

🎧 If this story moved you, follow Kintsugi Heroes in your podcast app so you never miss an episode.

📌 RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Out of the Fog: outofthefog.website

carlfox.com: carlfox.com

Lightunitedreiki.com: lightunitedreiki.com

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Welcome.

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Mentioned in this episode:

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