When a spouse dies or a marriage ends, most women leave their advisor. 

The real risk isn’t lost assets — it’s lost trust and connection that should never have been a single point of failure.

In this episode of Visionary Advisor, hosted by Alex Kirby (founder of Total Family), guests Katie Randall and Lisa Jones of Prime Capital Financial bring decades of experience working with women, couples, and families through life’s hardest transitions. Together, they reveal how most advisory practices are designed for men, ignoring the very clients who will soon control nearly all the money.

This conversation dives into why heirs, especially women, so often walk away and what it takes to build resilience into your practice. You’ll hear candid stories about shifting from jargon to plain language, embracing the “messy middle” of client emotions, and creating an environment where both partners and rising generations truly feel seen.

The discussion covers the communication gap between spouses, the risk of neglecting the unengaged partner, how to facilitate trust even mid-divorce, and actionable ways to elevate family conversations around values and legacy. The message is clear: the future belongs to the advisor who listens deeply, fosters safety, and serves the whole family — not just the one in the room.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode

• 00:00:18 Why the “widow exodus” is a design problem, not just a retention issue
• 00:01:47 The urgency of adapting your practice as women inherit the majority of wealth
• 00:03:40 How communication patterns differ between men and women — and why it matters
• 00:05:24 Practical ways to foster trust and make space for vulnerability in client meetings
• 00:11:12 Building genuine relationships with both spouses, not just the engaged partner
• 00:13:02 Techniques to defuse money tension between couples and promote active listening
• 00:32:01 Supporting grieving clients — why emotional presence matters more than products
• 00:40:26 The gap between perceived and actual listening among advisors (and how to close it)
• 00:43:14 Why using jargon and “advisor-speak” can alienate clients — and what to do instead
• 00:44:07 How women and men may approach legacy conversations differently

Notable Quotes from Katie Randall and Lisa Jones

“We have to stop putting things in terms of how advisors think and the way that we speak and just really, answer questions and ask questions in a way that clients ask them in, like, a very human way.” — Katie Randall

“Advisors are missing the mark. When there’s a death or a divorce, many times the female spouse will change advisors because she hasn’t felt seen or heard in the relationship.” — Lisa Jones

“We’re professional problem solvers, but first we really have to be professional problem finders.” — Katie Randall

“If you’re not creating space where somebody can cry in your office — and it happens at least once a week — you’re probably not going deep enough.” — Lisa Jones

“They don’t want to know what you know; they want to know that you care.” — LisaJones

“If the efficiency frontier and all this stuff is what you’re focused on, you’re missing what matters to clients.” — Katie Randall

Resources

• Total Family (https://www.totalfamily.io)
• Prime Capital (https://primefinanciallisa.com)
• JMP AI (https://jump.ai/)
• YouTube Channel: Katie Randall, CAIA® | Certified Advisor for Women (https://www.youtube.com/@moneymotherlode)

Stay Connected with Visionary Advisor
We believe wealth is well-being. Subscribe to the Visionary Advisor Newsletter for practical tools and ideas to serve families across generations.
Explore more at totalfamily.io | Follow us on LinkedIn | Watch episode clips on YouTube

Send us feedback

Stay Connected with Visionary Advisor
We believe wealth is well-being. Subscribe to the Visionary Advisor Newsletter for practical tools and ideas to serve families across generations.
Explore more at totalfamily.io | Follow us on LinkedIn |  Watch episode clips on YouTube