I spoke yesterday with the hilarious genius Chris Duffy about his book, HUMOR ME, which comes out on January 6th (no relation).

I loved the book and strongly urge / gently demand that you pre-order it now, ahead of the release, because that matters a lot when it comes to best seller lists which HUMOR ME definitely deserves to be on.

Chris has long been a friend and loyal BAThead that readers may remember from this essay: “love myself? knowing what i know?”. He’s also the writer of Bright Spots and the host of the TED podcast How to Be a Better Human.

And hey look at all these nice things people are saying about the book:

“Warning: this book may cause repeated smiling. It’s a delightful read about how we can bring more levity into our lives.”— Adam Grant, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Hidden Potential and Think Again, and host of the podcast Re:Thinking“Practical ways to giggle more every day? Without enabling my crippling laughing gas addiction? Yes, please!”—Bowen Yang, Emmy-nominated actor, comedian, and Saturday Night Live cast member“Chris Duffy is the kind of writer who makes me angry. Not only is he hilarious, but he is able to do something almost no humorist can: Research. I came away from this book happier, full of information I can’t WAIT to bring up casually in conversation, and with a newfound appreciation of elementary school lunch reviews.”— Bess Kalb, Emmy-nominated comedy writer and bestselling author of Nobody Will Tell You This But Me and Buffalo Fluffalo“I missed my deadline for sending the publisher a blurb, because I kept re-reading passages, taking notes, and telling my wife my favorite parts of this book. Luckily, I got an extension so that I could write the following: What a wonderful book! Funny, wise, inspiring, practical, and many other positive adjectives. Thank you for writing it, Chris. ”— A.J. Jacobs, New York Times bestselling author of The Year of Living Biblically“Humor Me is, of course, a very fun read. But it’s much more — a master class in using humor as a powerful tool to build a more vibrant and more connected life.”—Robert Waldinger, professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and New York Times bestselling author of The Good Life

two highlights from our chat + a question for you all

We talked about a lot of stuff so just listen / watch you goofballs, but two things in particular I wanted to flag:

the ymca is listening

We talked about the elaborate tricks people (myself not included, legally speaking) employ in order to make the YMCA Men’s Sauna in Asheville hotter.

That was yesterday.

Today, I walk into the sauna to find THIS:

Now if that ain’t comedy, I don’t know what is.

humor isn’t about ‘being funny’

Comedy is about who’s funny. Humor is about who’s laughing, and they’re not the same thing!!

We tend to equate “a good sense of humor” with being the person at the center of attention—the one telling the story, landing the punchline, commanding the room. But that’s a narrow, performance-oriented definition.

Chris shared research showing that when people say they want a partner with a good sense of humor, they usually mean someone they can laugh with, not someone auditioning for a Netflix special. (Hetero men, apparently, are more likely to misinterpret this as “someone who laughs at my jokes,” which – come on fellas, let’s get it together here!!!)

The people with the best sense of humor aren’t always the ones making the jokes. They’re the ones creating conditions where laughter happens. They notice things. They’re generous with amusement. They’re willing to look a little foolish.

I find this hard, but I am working on it.

Alrighty, that’s it – go listen to the convo and buy the book.

what makes you laugh every time??

Wait! One big thing we talked about was making a list of the things that always make you laugh. Chris shared his top choice, this video:

My favs include this absolute classic:

and my fav comedy video of all time, Broomshakala:

question for you all

What’s a video or joke or concept or whatever that always makes you laugh?

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