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🎙️ Episode 37: Midlife Upgrade: Talking Grief, Community, Sex, and Money in Midlife with Pamela DeRose and Julie Fedeli

Guest: Pamela DeRose and Julie Fedeli

Air Date: 10/2/26

✨ Episode Summary

Aly speaks with Julie Fedeli and Pamela DeRose, co-founders of Midlife Upgrade, about what midlife looks like for women beyond the “crisis” label. They explore grief, changing friendships, self-advocacy, pleasure, money, and why community matters in this stage of life.Julie and Pamela share how their experiences with menopause and perimenopause led them to create a book, events, a Substack, and a course designed to help women feel supported, informed, and less alone.

Key topics

• How Pamela’s own perimenopause and menopause experience inspired Midlife Upgrade, despite her decades of health-coaching experience.
• What a “midlife upgrade” means: recognizing your power and making space for conversations about health, finances, sex, relationships, community, and grief.
• The many forms grief can take in midlife—including changes in friendships, relationships, family, bodies, and expectations.
• Why friendships may shift in midlife, and how women can intentionally create deeper connections and community.
• What Pamela learned about rethinking old health habits and listening to her changing body.
• Why everyday self-care—sleep, hydration, nourishing food, and morning sunlight—can matter more than occasional treats.
• The need for open conversations about women’s sexual health, pleasure, and menopause.
• Why women’s health research and medical education need greater attention.
• How money can be a difficult topic for women to discuss, and why financial confidence matters.
• The importance of self-advocacy, trusting your own experience, and seeking knowledgeable healthcare providers.

• Notice when old health habits no longer serve your body, and stay curious about what does.
• Think of self-care as the daily basics that support wellbeing.
• Ask questions about menopause and sexual health, and seek care that takes your concerns seriously.
• Make room for grief and change rather than feeling you have to push through everything.
• Invest in supportive, meaningful connections with other women.

Connect with Pam and Julie:

Website: ⁠midlifeupgrade.com

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