Check out all the programs or join the newsletter: efratamira.comYour kid’s team just lost, and the first thing he hears is, “That must have been hard, be easy on yourself.” It sounds kind, but when that is the whole message, it keeps him stuck in a victim mindset.Trauma, anxiety, triggers: words that once belonged in the therapist’s office are now part of our kids’ everyday lives, at school and at home. In this episode I trace where this language came from and what it is doing to our children, and then I share an older story from Jewish wisdom that teaches kids the world is for them.In this video:How our culture’s focus on physical safety grew into “emotional safety,” and how the word trauma came to mean almost anything that hurtsWhat Abigail Shrier found inside today’s classrooms, from trauma-informed education to social-emotional learningWhy the words a child uses shape the way he experiences his own lifeFour ways to help your child meet challenges as chances to grow💬 Think of a hard moment your child came through and grew from, and share it in the comments. Other parents need to hear those stories.▶ Watch next: Why Your Anxious Child Doesn’t Have a Feelings Problem, They Have an Identity Problem:https://youtu.be/Ldsgq7D5wcw?si=NdMytL2yL6Ppw0cbChapters:0:00 When ”be easy on yourself” backfires0:28 How therapy words went mainstream0:52 What this video will show you1:11 How a safety culture took over1:50 How the meaning of ”trauma” changed2:21 Pain vs trauma: why the difference matters2:47 Normal hardships now called trauma3:34 The loop of fragility3:56 Bad Therapy: what's happening in schools4:42 Trauma-informed education5:04 The mountain: too much focus on feelings5:19 Overprotected kids and real-life growth6:03 Post-traumatic growth6:14 What happens when kids believe they're fragile6:39 Your turn: share your story6:54 The older story that strengthens7:30 The Art of Elevation: the world is for you8:04 Two questions: ”Why me?” vs ”What am I asked to do?”8:38 The deeper meaning of hardship9:38 Pain has meaning9:51 Four steps to start at home10:04 Step 1: Honor feelings, then guide forward10:32 Step 2: Share your own hard moments10:53 Step 3: Tell stories of heroic figures11:13 Step 4: Help your child take one action11:37 Your home can tell a different story11:57 Watch next: The anxious child and identityBooks and sources mentionedGreg Lukianoff & Jonathan Haidt, The Coddling of the American MindNassim Nicholas Taleb, AntifragileAbigail Shrier, Bad Therapy: Why the Kids Aren’t Growing UpYehiel Harari, The Art of ElevationRyan Holiday, The Obstacle Is the WayFoulkes & Andrews (2023), “Are mental health awareness efforts contributing to the rise in reported mental health problems?” New Ideas in Psychology: https://doi.org/10.1016/j.newideapsych.2023.101010CDC, Data and Statistics on Children’s Mental Health: https://www.cdc.gov/children-mental-health/data-research/index.htmlThis video is about the ordinary hardships every child faces. If your child has been through abuse or serious trauma, please reach out to a qualified professional for support.Parenting Wisdom with Efrat Amira helps parents of kids 8 and up raise children with strong values, inner strength and a sense of purpose. Subscribe for a new episode every week.#parenting #resilientkids #parentingadvice #raisingkids