In this episode of ILLUMENATE, Chris sits down with Zach Millimet, a newly retired CIA officer who spent 20 years in the Directorate of Operations with assignments in Eastern Europe, the Middle East, and South Asia. Zach shares the arc of his life from growing up without a father, to finding purpose through service, to navigating a major career transition into government affairs for a climate tech startup in Minnesota. The conversation opens with Zach’s “why” — his lifelong drive to make a difference and help others — and quickly becomes a powerful reflection on identity, family, and meaning.

Zach speaks candidly about the pivotal experiences that shaped him, including 9/11, his early struggles with anger and self-understanding, and the formative role of his grandfather, stepfather, wife, and children. He describes how becoming a father changed him, how marriage and parenthood forced him to grow beyond ego, and how his wife’s support helped him learn what healthy partnership and parenting can look like. He also shares the challenge of balancing a demanding career in intelligence with family life and the emotional toll of years spent abroad.

The discussion goes deeper into the moments that pushed Zach toward transformation: his return from Afghanistan, the impact of the pandemic, and the immense strain of his daughter’s health battles. Through those hardships, Zach describes a process of healing that included therapy, increased emotional honesty, and a renewed commitment to showing up for his family. He also talks about his Buddhist practice, the spiritual rupture he experienced during his daughter’s illness, and the ongoing work of rebuilding a practice that fits who he is now.

The episode closes with a candid conversation about masculinity, vulnerability, community, and growth. Zach makes the case that being a healthy man is not about control or performance, but about compassion, emotional awareness, generosity, and service to others. He and Chris reflect on the limits of online connection, the importance of real community, and the need for men to seek help and stay open to change. This is a thoughtful, honest, and hopeful conversation about deconstruction, resilience, and the possibility of becoming a better human at any stage of life.

ILLUMENATE is a podcast that tells the stories of men with good hearts, open minds, and a desire to make the world better for everyone — not just them and theirs. More info: https://illumenate.substack.com/about