What does it actually take to build a relationship that lasts? 💑✨

We sit down with Julie Menanno — couples therapist, bestselling author of Secure Love, and one of the most followed relationship experts in the world with over 1 million followers. 💫 She's the woman couples turn to when they've tried everything and still can't stop having the same fight — and she has a remarkable gift for making the most complicated emotional dynamics feel suddenly, completely clear.

This isn't a conversation about relationship tips. It's a deep dive into why relationships can really struggle, what emotional safety actually means, and why the enemy in your relationship is never your partner — it's the negative cycle you're both trapped in.

💑 Julie Menanno is a licensed couples therapist and the author of Secure Love — described as a must-read for couples. She built her following on Instagram during COVID by translating the most complex relationship science into content that millions of people felt seen by. She works with real couples in private practice in Bozeman, Montana, is married with six children, and is currently writing her second book. She doesn't just explain what can be going wrong — she gives you the exact tools make relationships great. 

We cover:

💬 Why couples can keep having the same argument — and what's really underneath it 🧠 Attachment needs: what they are, why they matter, and what happens when they go unmet 😢 The three things blocking you from using the skills you already have — fear, shame and unresolved grief 🪞 How to have a better relationship with yourself before you can have one with someone else ⚡ The ”thousand paper cuts” — why small moments destroy relationships as much as big events ❤️‍🔥 What the best partners actually do in the moments that matter most 🙏 Gratitude as a tool for connection — and why it works neurologically 💔 What to do when a relationship feels hopeless — and why that moment can become the turning point 🗣️ The exact words to use when you need to be vulnerable but don't know how

🎧🔥❤️‍🔥 LISTEN VIA LINK IN BIO & ❤️‍🔥🔥🎧 __https://linktr.ee/pitchingpassion __

🎁 Listeners get 10% off using the code thekollective10 at audreyschocolates.co.uk 🍫

🔥 Fireside Chat 🔥

📚 Favourite book: A Tale of Two Cities — Charles Dickens. Also loves Oliver Burkeman's Four Thousand Weeks.

🎬 Favourite film: The Royal Tenenbaums.

🎵 Artist right now: Mumford & Sons — she just got tickets to see them in Bozeman and has been listening to the new album on repeat.

💬 Words to your younger self: ”You deserved more than that. You deserved better than that.”

🪣 One thing to add to the bucket list today: To appear on the Drew Barrymore Show.

🌍 One thing you'd love to learn more about: Italian — she's been learning for years and wants to keep going deeper.

❤️‍🔥 Loved this episode? ✨ Like, Share, and Subscribe — and if this conversation gave you something, come join us on Patreon. Become a member, get exclusive content, and put your questions to future guests. Link below.

WANT MORE OR TO SUPPORT? 👉 Become a patron and get exclusive access & behind-the-scenes perks:www.patreon.com/TheKollective828 💎

☕ Want to make a one off donation to support the show 🙏 :https://buymeacoffee.com/pitchingpassion

Mentions: Julie Menanno · Secure Love · Charles Dickens · Oliver Burkeman · Four Thousand Weeks · The Royal Tenenbaums · Mumford & Sons · Marcus Mumford · Drew Barrymore · Bozeman Montana · Instagram · Attachment Theory · Emotionally Focused Therapy